As you contemplate your decision for your unplanned pregnancy, we want to empower you with resources. You will want to learn about all of your options. Adoption is one of them. If you haven’t considered adoption before, we want to share some information with you.
The adoption process has drastically changed. A modern adoption is completely in the hands of the birth mother, and father if he is available. Today, you make an adoption plan that meets your desires for your child. You decide who the adoptive parents will be, what type of adoption you are comfortable with, and even what environment you want your child to grow up in. Although it is not an easy decision, you are in complete control.
If you feel like you aren’t capable of handling the day-to-day responsibilities or you aren’t able to parent a child, adoption may be the answer. When handled through an agency or attorney, potential adopting families go through a screening process that includes background checks, home studies, and interviews.
There are three basic adoption plans. Each plan can be tailored to suit your requests. You choose which plan is right for you.
An open adoption generally refers to a plan where the birth parents and adoptive parents share identifying information such as first and last names, addresses, phone numbers, and any other contact information. In addition, in-person contact between the two families can happen before and after the birth depending on the type of relationship everyone wishes to have.
As the birth mother, you determine how much contact you want to have with the adoptive family and, eventually, your child. You can request photos, updates through letters or email, and even occasional visits. Many prospective birth moms choose open adoption because they want to build a relationship with the family that adopts their child.
A closed adoption plan means there is no identifying information exchanged, no in-person visits, and no ongoing contact. The birth mother has complete anonymity. Often, a birth mother sees a closed adoption as a way to move on with her life. It can offer a sense of closure and privacy. Plus, it closes the door to further discussion if family and friends are not in favor of the adoption.
A semi-open adoption plan means the communication you do have will be through a third party, like an attorney or an adoption agency. You will still choose the adopting family, but your relationship will be more controlled.
You may exchange first names, but usually no other identifying information such as phone numbers or addresses are given. Since contact goes through a representative, you and the family can still receive information from each other about your child.
Your next steps
There is a lot to consider with adoption. Like your other options, parenting and abortion, it is a life-altering decision. Adoption takes great strength, courage and support to make this choice. We know you are strong. Our caring team is available to offer support through the adoption process and to give you referrals to agencies if you are interested. We want to equip you with as much information as possible to make the best choice for you. We are here to offer support.