“I think I’m pregnant.”
If you are not expecting to hear these four little words, they can pack a real punch. You may experience feelings of fear, anger, shame, and guilt. The list goes on. You are probably wondering “what do I do next?” We can and will help you navigate through this difficult time.
At Elevier we don’t just help pregnant women, but the father as well. We have a Male Advocate Team (men only) to offer a safe and private setting for you to discuss your situation and help you answer questions.
Consider that the decisions you are about to make will likely affect you for the rest of your life. Give us a call if you want to visit with another man, one who has already experienced what you are now going through.
Your next steps
An unplanned pregnancy is not just a woman’s issue, it impacts men. You may wonder what role you should play (if any) in your partner’s decision. Following are a few suggestions.
What you should do
- Confirm there is a pregnancy. We offer lab quality pregnancy tests and a limited obstetrical ultrasound. You will know if she is pregnant, the date of conception, and if there is a viable pregnancy.
- Set up an appointment to get answers to your questions, discuss your situation and options with one of our Male Advocates.
- Consult with those you respect – parents and friends. Be honest with yourself and your partner. The two of you are in this situation together.
- Ask each other questions like: “Do we think we could co-parent?”, “What do we think about making an adoption plan?”, “How do we feel about abortion?” By talking through these options you both can be confident in your final decision.
- You and your partner want to work through this together. No one should have to choose how to handle an unplanned pregnancy on their own.
What you should not do
- Do not pressure her. It is important that both of you take time to make this life-altering decision.
- Listen to the advice of others, but do not rely on them for the final answer. You are the ones who will live with your final decision.
- Think how this decision will look to both of you 5, 10, 25 years from now.
- Do not throw up your hands and say, “Do whatever you want.” She is looking to you for assurance that you will both make the right decision.
- Do not walk away. Because you are reading this, we know you are a man of integrity. See the process through to the final choice.
It’s okay for both of you to be overwhelmed. No matter what your relationship is like now, you’re in this together. Even though you are not dealing with the physical aspects of pregnancy, there are emotional effects. After all, you are a father. Sharing your feelings and concerns is an important part of getting through this together.
Make an appointment with an Advocate today. Let us help you work through this important decision. All of our services and consultations are offered at no cost.